Show Up: The Mindset Shift That Changes Everything

"Life isn’t fair," I said it out loud yesterday while talking to my youngest. We were deep in a conversation about what to do when you don’t feel seen—when the role you worked so hard for doesn’t happen when the opportunity you wanted so badly is given to someone else.

It’s funny—sometimes, as a mom, you just want to throw a tantrum right along with them. To pout, to cry, to yell, “It’s not fair!” But then you remember… oh yeah, I’m the adult, and I have to act like one. So instead of flopping on the floor in dramatic protest, you take a deep breath and do your real job—guiding them through it.

Crying and pouting? Totally valid. But at some point, you have to shift your mindset. Life isn’t fair. People will disappoint you. And in that moment, I felt like God handed me the exact words I needed, straight from His lips to our house.

I looked at her and said, “You keep showing up. You show up better than the lead. You show up like you’re meant to be there. And most importantly, you show up for yourself."

And wow. Not only does she actually listen to me (win!), but I had never thought of it that way before. And she’s so right.

Showing Up, Even When It’s Hard

It’s easy to feel discouraged when life doesn’t go as planned. When we put in the work, when we believe we’ve earned something, and it still doesn’t happen—it stings. It’s human nature to feel disappointed. But what we do next is what is most important. The truth is, we can’t control anybody or most things. But we can control how we show up.

Dress for the Job You Want—In Life

This phrase has always been my go-to, usually with a focus on outward appearance. I firmly believe in taking the time to look presentable—going the extra mile because it's the easiest way to make a first impression.

But my daughter and God's grace helped me see it’s so much bigger than an outfit. It’s about embodying the mindset, energy, and work ethic of where you want to be, even if you’re not there yet.

If you show up half-heartedly, waiting for someone to notice you, you’ll stay in the background. But if you step into every moment with the confidence and presence of someone who belongs, people will take notice. More importantly, you will take notice. And that shift is powerful.

The Beauty in the Small Roles

Not everyone gets to be the lead. But does that mean your role isn’t important? Absolutely not. There is beauty in showing up fully, no matter where you stand. There is power in treating every opportunity—big or small—as a chance to grow and lead.

You Can’t Change the Game, But You Can Change How You Play

Life isn’t fair. It never will be. But fairness isn’t the goal—showing up as your best self is.

So, the next time you feel unseen, overlooked, or like your hard work isn’t paying off, remember this:

• Show up anyway.

• Give your best, even when no one is watching.

• Carry yourself with the confidence of someone who belongs.

• And most of all, do it for you.

  
  

Because how you show up today shapes where you’ll be tomorrow. And that? That changes everything.