The Want List: Creating Space Between Buying and Contentment

What Is a Want List (and Why I Keep One)

A chunky, cropped sweater with large buttons. 

A How to Embroider People book. (This may not even be a thing!)

A Blythe Leonard bag, the larger size, so it actually fits my laptop.

And the list goes on.

It’s my want list. A running list on my phone where I dump everything I think I “must have” in the moment. It’s honestly funny to scroll back and see what made the list last year and never made it into my life. Like the Pilea peperomioides plant. Not sure what video convinced me I needed one of those, but here we are. And a rain barrel for the garden. Okay, maybe that one’s a keeper.

The January Spending Pause

In January, I do a spending pause. I try (because I am human) not to buy what I want. Only what I need. Of course, this is also the month my favorite local shop, full of secondhand gold, is having a sale. I mean, supporting local during the slowest month of the year could be considered a need. I’m helping the economy, okay?

Impulse Buying and the Dopamine Hit

It’s not only a pause for my wallet, but a pause for the dopamine hit of the “add to cart” button as soon as I see an influencer wearing the perfect sweater. Or the rush of trying a new hobby that may only last a few weeks. Adding it to the want list gives it room to breathe. It creates space between the feeling and the purchase. That shirt. That home décor piece. That new workout thing (do I need a wobble board?). That quick-fix tea promising weight loss in 10–12 business days.

Who We’re Really Shopping For

Y’all, those wants are usually for the person we envision ourselves to be. They’re tied to an illusion in our heads. If I just had this, I’d feel better. Look better. Be happier. He would like me. She would want to be my friend. “If only” doesn’t get you very far.

Why Contentment Has to Come First

What we see on the internet is not us. It’s a version of us we think we want. And chasing that version distracts us from the person we’re actually called to be. That dress won’t make your problems disappear. And not buying it and deciding to do a capsule wardrobe won’t either. Contentment has to come first.

Learning to Love the Real Version of You

You have to love yourself, the messy, real version of you. You have to get creative with what you already own, because hopefully, some part of you bought it for you, not an illusion of yourself. Mix and match what’s hanging in your closet. Let your real style come out. Find joy in things that don’t evaporate the moment the package is opened.

Get Inspired, But Don’t Try to Become Someone Else

So as we carry on this year, get inspired by others, but don’t wish to become them. Become who God called you to be. Get comfortable with yourself, your style, and what you already own. You don’t need anything.

A Simple Challenge: Try the Want List This Month

So… can you do it? Not buy your wants for the rest of the month and add them to your want list instead.

Then, on February 1st, we can laugh about all the dumb stuff we were convinced we needed.